Many of us have long suspected that our spiny visitors have secretly developed advanced technologies to defeat our attempts to keep an eye on them. Such things as cloaking devices to defeat cameras, quantum tunneling capability to cross gardens instantaneously and faster than light warp drives to magically cover huge distances. The problem has always been catching them at it!
Whilst having a beer in the garden the other evening I witnessed and filmed two hedgepigs engaging their warp drives and vanishing, faster than light. Here is the evidence….
https://twitter.com/4thslip/status/1146694932649918465
Be afraid, these technologies may become self-aware thus enabling hedgepigs to complete their takeover and banish us to living under bushes ourselves.